


Hurts and the Things that Heal

by tooAliveToSeeYa



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Anyway she's really sad, BAMF Undyne (Undertale), Babyfishies, Child Undyne (Undertale), F/F, Frisk (Undertale) Is a Sweetheart, Frisk is a babyfish, Frisk is smol, Hurt Undyne, If there are babybones there are babyfishes, No seriously Undyne is in pain, POV Undyne (Undertale), She doesnt call frisk a punk i failed u guys, Undyne (Undertale) Swears, Undyne Charater Study, Undyne has PTSD, Undyne is a babyfish, Undyne-centric (Undertale), Well...in this fic, but its gets better, just kidding, no beta we die like men, undyne is sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:06:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27940496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tooAliveToSeeYa/pseuds/tooAliveToSeeYa
Summary: Undyne remembered when she had to fill the hole in her chest with human blood. She remembered when she kept pushing through the loss, desperation, and loneliness. She remembered hurting, hurting so bad she couldn't ever, EVER let someone else hurt like that. As long as she stayed DETERMINED, she would never let a monster feel that pain... she would never let that human feel that pain.So Undyne stood up and ran.
Relationships: Alphys/Undyne (Undertale), Asgore Dreemurr & Undyne, Frisk & Undyne (Undertale), Gerson & Undyne (Undertale), Papyrus & Undyne (Undertale), Sans & Undyne (Undertale), Undyne & Undyne's Father (Undertale), Undyne & Undyne's Mother (Undertale)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 18





	Hurts and the Things that Heal

**Author's Note:**

> Did I mention I love Undyne? Well I love Undyne. She needs more rep, she's such a great character (and wife). Anyway gonna add more to the Undyne centric tab bc really, she's amazing. And dam she's DETERMINED. There a reason why she kicks Frisk's ass in Genocide. This is pacifist but either way the backgrounds the same.

Undyne hated Asgore when they first met. 

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Undyne never met a human before Frisk. And far before Alphys introduced her to the magical world of anime all Undyne ever really knew about them was from the story of the prince and Gerson’s stories of the war. Full grown men, driven by fear and rage towards the monsters, dusting a peaceful race just because they could. 

Of course there had been the fallen child, but they seemed to glaze over in her mind. A human who wasn’t human because they were part of the royal family. A forgotten name that melded into “us”, and let Undyne paint a picture of humans striking them down with the same hate from before.

Undyne never met a human before Frisk. But when she was a small hot headed babyfish, determined to free their race —  _ not that that changed when she grew older —  _ a human fell into the Underground. A young boy, with blond curls and pale freckles and brown eyes and  _ a gun clutched in his left hand _ . And then there was dust and locked doors and missing guards.

Undyne, who was used to running through Waterfall and digging through the dump for cool human stuff, was confined to her house, her father’s narrow yellow eyes fixed on her at all times. Her mother, who was part of the royal guard, hardly came home. But when she did she looked tired and worried. And when Undyne looked for too long, she thought some of the white of her mother’s pale scales was actually dust. 

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Then one day, her mother didn’t come home and her father closed his eyes.

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The human was gone shortly after but the damage was already done. There was so much to do and Undyne wouldn’t sit still — _ not like she did when her mother left —  _ Every morning, Undyne made breakfast and then left to check Waterfall. Families —  _ what was left of them —  _ ventured out of their homes to find the dust of their loved ones and Undyne helped. Monsters who died in the water were lost but there were still those who were salvageable. But it was still hard to tell who was missing or in hiding or who was gone. Undyne would return home dripping wet for lunch so she could bundle up and head to Snowdin.

Dust was hard to see in the snow but Undyne could tell the difference —  _ she remembered the grey grain on her mothers fins. So she had to know the difference. She had to find her mom. All she had left of her was her dust and if she couldn’t find it then —  _ Undyne stayed everyday until her hands were stiff and numb from digging around and her fins stuck frozen to her cheeks. She stopped by her house on the way to Hotland to change before heading into the blistering heat.

Hotland was the easiest to find dust but the sweltering heat and size of the place made up for the lack of work. Thankfully by the time the human got to Hotland, most monsters had gone into hiding. But those who didn’t — _ those who dare challenge such a terrible creature met their end —  _ still needed their dust to be collected.

At the end of the day Undyne would drag her body back to Waterfall to stand under the rainfalls. She would sit there until her scales were no longer cracking from the heat and no one could tell that the wet on her face had been tears — _ because where was she? Where was her mother? Where was her dust? _

Her father never said anything to her. Not since her mother didn’t come back. Not since —  _ Undyne didn’t bring her home. If she just brought her mother home then it would be ok. Dad would go back to normal, he had to go back to normal. She needed him to wake up —  _ the human was killed. All he did was lay in bed, the plates of food Undyne had left for him all cold and untouched. Undyne tried to make him eat. She pleaded, begged, screamed, cried, but nothing worked. He just lay there with his eyes closed and breath shallow. Until one day his blue scales turned white and he too was gone. Until all Undyne was left with was an empty house and a burning question.

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_ Where was Asgore? _

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Gerson didn’t take her under his wing as much as he manhandled her into a headlock. If Undyne had been hothead before, she was a feral beast now. The only one keeping her from destroying their already fragile home was Gerson. But her desire for someone to sink her teeth into never faded. She needed someone to make  _ pay _ for the loss of her family. To make  _ suffer _ for all the dust that was shed. And on Undyne’s list of “to do”s was the destruction of all humanity and execution of Asgore. Because how  _ could _ he?

He was supposed to be their king. Their protector. Their hero. But when the Underground was covered in dust where was he? What had he done to help them? What had he done to save her mom? Her dad? Anyone at all? Whatever he had done —  _ if he did anything at all —  _ it was too little, too late and Undyne would make sure he knew it.

Undyne cried when she couldn’t hit him. Ugly tears, snot, and loud screams. Because even through blurry tears, Undyne could see that he hated himself just as much as she hated him. And that wasn’t right. He was supposed to be a careless ruler. A selfish bastard who didn’t give a damn if Undyne was motherless. Because that’s the Asgore she hated. The one who let everything she loved shatter.

He wasn’t supposed to be broken as well. He wasn’t supposed to be apologetic or nice —  _ because what did that leave Undyne with? Misplaced anger and pieces? —  _ And when Undyne finally did knock him down, she just felt… empty. She couldn’t hate him. Or even be mad at him. There was nothing satisfying about hurting someone who never meant you any harm. 

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Then Undyne met Papyrus

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Papyrus reminded her so,  _ so _ much of her younger self. Ambitious, hopeful —  _ desperate—  _ and she would be damned if he was ruined like she was. Undyne was slapped in the face by the cruelty of the world. But even as a babyfish, she wanted to get back at the humans. Papyrus never wanted to hurt anyone. He hadn't learned that you have to hurt others before they hurt —  _ you. Before they hurt you so badly you could never be the same—  _ the ones you love. He hadn't lost anything yet. 

So Undyne would be damned if anything broke his spirit. Undyne was determined enough to pull herself together but Papyrus? She knew it would crush his SOUL to know how the world worked. That there was no other answer. No other way. The humans had to perish for them to thrive. 

When Undyne saw him sitting outside her house, looking as bright as ever, like he didn’t just spend the whole night —  _ waiting for her mother to come. Waiting and waiting until her dad fell dow—  _ she felt a certain tenderness in her heart. She accepted him and offered to train him. At first it was combat, she made sure he knew how to defend himself —  _ how to protect herself from anyone who tried to hurt the ones she loved. The ones she needed. _

Papyrus excelled. He really was just like her, dedicated and always looking to improve. He really was as great as he said he was, Undyne was proud of how positive he was, his desire to bring hope to the monsters was —  _ nothing like her desperation to make up for all the losses —  _ admirable.

But she knew she could never let him join the royal guard. Not when he was so pure, so obvious to the horrors of the world. Undyne was surprised though, when Sans showed up at her doorstep. For how lazy and unmotivated he seemed he was passionate about his brother. About his brother and his safety. 

When he recommended she not let Papyrus join the royal guard Undyne almost felt like he was threatening her. She wasn’t scared of course,  _ pff,  _ this was Sans they were talking about. He couldn’t do anything to her… could she? Regardless she soothed his worries of protecting Papyrus' innocence. 

Undyne was shocked when Sans offered her a plan to make him a sentry at the door of the ruins. He would be the first to greet the human instead of Papyrus, he could keep his brother safe like that. Keep an eye on whatever wandered out of the ruins. Undyne admired that in Sans. Sure he was lazy and had the strangest addiction to ketchup but —  _ at least he cared. Cared enough to get out of bed and help her. Help her find her mother’s dust. Help her mourn. Help her not to break into pieces—  _ he looked out for his brother. He wouldn’t let a human  _ — ruin her and leave her with nothing —  _ hurt his family.

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Then Undyne met her first human.

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They weren't much bigger than a babyfish, maybe even smaller than Undyne at their age. They held themselves with the same kind of confidence she had —  _ that of a foolish child unaware of the pain she would endure—  _ and easily dodged all of Undyne's attacks. Worst of all: they SPAREd her.

Undyne was furious. She had waited so long for this. So long to give back the same pain she felt, to free her people, to finally make peace to her mother. And that  _ little shit _ had the audacity to SPARE her? As if she was in need of MERCY. As if she didn't know what she wanted —  _ the little brats death.  _ So Undyne hurled spear after spear, her anger taking more energy out of her than her use of magic. How was it that that wimpy loser was besting her? How were they getting the better of her? —  _ how could they make her feel helpless all over again? _

When she collapsed at the bridge all she could think was how she failed her mother. Failed to honor her. She never found her dust. The least she could do was kill this human. Kill them and free —  _ herself from this ache  _ — everyone. Laying the sweltering heat, she remembered a time where she welcomed the heat. Where it meant she had a chance to find something, anything of her mother.

The water on her head shocked her. She flew to her feet and started down at the human holding the cup. They had to crane their head back to look up at her. She could see the DETERMINATION in their eyes, uh, closed eyes. They gripped the cup in their tiny cubby hands and it was then that Undyne got a good look at them and… they were  _ tiny _ . At first she was embarrassed that this small human bested her, she huffed and stormed off, instantly going to cool off in the waterfalls and ever present rain.

But as she stomped through the puddles, her embarrassment turned to shame. Yes they were a human, but they were tiny. They were a small and soft babyfish. No scales and no armor to protect themself. She remembered the flimsy tutu they wore, the tattered notebook they clutched like it would protect them. She recognized the crab apples Gerson was loved as they stuffed in their mouth to restore their health. They didn’t tremble when they looked up at her but they crushed the paper cup in their hands.

They were weak, she was weak. Years and years later, she was still weak. She stumbled into her house and casted her armor away. She stared at the giant sword she had in the corner. She was ready for a fight with a human that handled a sword twice their size with precision and ferocity. Undyne was not ready for the human she met. 

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“We're not going to say goodbye to you just yet!”

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Undyne didn’t know she meant it at the time. She was caught up in her wife, uh, girlfriend and how adorable she was and how she could now shower Alphys in praise. While Alphys had been ashamed and anxious at showing them her lab Undyne was proud. She was sad Alphys had spent so much time trying to deal with it alone and feeling so,  _ so _ awful. But she knew Alphys was only trying to help. Save those who had fallen down. Save —  _ her dad from wasting away in bed when Undyne needed him —  _ a family.

Undyne knew what it was like to feel so alone. What it was like to try and try and try but hurt all the while. To shove down it all so she could keep going. To keep going and know that no one would help you. No one would hold your hand and just be there for you. Be there when you were alone and hurting and —  _ looking for her mother dust and looking  _ for a way home.

And then Undyne was on her feet. She ran through the heat of hotland, she breathed heavily as she choked on the fever of the lava. She ran through the core, her chest clenching and her limbs tingling in panic as she rushed through the maze. She ran through New Home. Her legs pumping and sweat pouring down her back as she ran and ran and ran. 

Undyne would not let the Human die. She would not let them face this alone. She loved Asgore but she couldn’t do this to them. It might be the highest treason but she couldn’t. They were a babyfish —  _ she was a babyfish just wishing —  _ just hoping —  _ somebody would care —  _ somebody would come.

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And everybody came.


End file.
